Courage to be seen
Last week, I went on my first solo road trip.
I can't remember the last time I spent so much time on my own. It's amazing what comes to the surface when you don't have the noise and hustle of daily life to distract you! Now, I'm comfortable with being by myself. I thrive on it. I'm an introvert at heart, and my 'rest and revive' comes from my alone time.
It surprises people when they find out I’m an introvert. Some even question it. But if, by definition, an introvert is someone who internally processes (until they don't and become socially awkward!!), is a quiet thinker, has a passion for deep conversation, and would rather stay home with close friends than head out once again to a large party with people you don't know, I’m exactly that!
Being an introvert doesn't mean I'm shy around others or nervous speaking in front of large crowds; I can do both. However, being an introvert does mean I've had to learn the art of small talk and finding the energy to answer the phone, not to mention making calls! (If you know, you know!)
Don't get me wrong, I love people and can be just as vibrant and bubbly as the biggest extrovert in the room, but there is a cut-off point when I turn into a pumpkin!! From night to night, I am never sure when that time will come, but when it hits, I am ready for home NOW!!
Sometimes, the buzz of people, the busyness of the world, and all it means to be human are a little overwhelming for someone like me. I'd much rather pull myself away from the crowd, find a quiet corner, and sit with one or two people, discussing the mysteries of life into the small hours of the night.
And even more than that, I'm happy being hidden, quietly living my life without the fanfare and bright lights. I'm a 'behind the scenes' human when all is said and done, and I love my ‘alone time.’ Perhaps that's why I love lighthouses; the life of a lighthouse keeper used to be so appealing to me. Left alone, isolated from the rest of the world. Hidden away with my thoughts.
But here's the thing: we were never meant to do life completely alone, hidden from those around us.
For many years, I was so fearful of being seen, of standing up and speaking out. I was much more comfortable sitting alone with my thoughts, never daring to share them with anyone else. Hidden was safe and predictable; hidden was without expectation, but hidden was also lonely. Deep down, I knew I was missing out on connection with others, authentic connection, not the social media kind, but I was scared.
Being human is scary and being seen scarier, yet it's also beautiful and freeing.
We were created for community, to be seen, known, and heard, but that takes courage. Let's face it: None of us really enjoys revealing our internal struggles, pain, and mess. We are much more inclined to show our clean, shiny successes. But being truly known asks more of us.
It requires vulnerability and living from the inside out.
In my messy and beautiful 53 years on this earth, I've learnt that daring to sit long enough with myself to discover who I am and finding the courage to share my struggles, aha moments, and thoughts, even in half sentences, is worth it. There is something so powerful about finding your voice, stepping out of the shadows, and daring to speak up, though your knees may be shaking and your heart racing.
As I risked rejection and judgment by allowing others into the 'mess and vulnerable' of my world, I found the connection and belonging I had missed out on for so long.
Something else happened.
I discovered that when I was brave enough to hold space for myself, it freed me to hold space for others! Seeing myself, the real me, and learning to love who I saw helped me to truly see and love those around me. It was confronting, but it was also one of the best decisions I ever made!
What if…
today, you, too, made the courageous choice to hold space for yourself, to sit long enough to discover the wonder of who you are and all that lies below the surface of everyday life.
you dared to find the courage to speak up, raise your voice and share your story, struggles and victories with those around you, even if it’s in half sentences as you stumble over your words.
by doing that, you not only found real community and connection but also became someone who holds space for those around you to be seen, heard, known and loved for their authentic and unique selves.
I know it can be confronting, and there are moments when it’s much easier to stay hidden and safe as the fear of rejection screams, “Run.” But what if, instead of running, you had the courage to be seen and finally found the belonging and connection you’ve been missing? And who knows, you just might be surprised about all your voice has to say!
